Thoughts on the Journey

Blessed...to be a blessing

2011-11-02T15:36:00.005-05:00

Last night it was someone's birthday. There was no family gathered around. No streamers. No cake. No gifts. No birthday song. No celebration. There was just a man who was hungry and filthy, and he was the only person in the room that knew November 1st was his day. His birthday dinner took place in a church, surrounded by others who were poor, needy, and hungry. He was served a meal of tamales, rice, beans, and pineapple. I asked him if he needed anything else, and he said smiling, “I’m fine. No…I’m great.” His birthday came and went. It really was unremarkable. But to me it was remarkable. I was able to pray with him that he would be blessed, and that he would know God’s amazing, unconditional, immeasurable love on his birthday, and every day.

I stood there, wearing my new shirt, and scanned the room...gazing into the eyes of men and women living rather messed up lives. Maybe choices, a devastating circumstance, or the family they were born into launched them toward this place.

God's grace, care and provision has been extravagant in my life. But, while serving the physical needs of these people last night, I was reminded again that I’m not blessed just because God picked me out to be one of the lucky ones to live a comfortable life. I’m blessed…to be a blessing. And blessing others makes me feel so, so good.

2 Corinthians 9:8, 10-12
And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. As it is written: “They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor; their righteousness endures forever.” Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.

The REAL First Thanksgiving

2010-11-22T10:34:00.003-06:00

Is it okay to change the part in history where it says Thanksgiving originated with pilgrims and turkey and other stuff(ing)? The REAL first Thanksgiving happened not hundreds, but thousands of years ago…

There were two brothers, two offerings and two very different responses. The Lord was looking for the men to realize who was God and who was not. So, He invented thanksgiving by asking them to bring an offering of praise to Him.

At harvest time Cain brought to the LORD a gift of his farm produce, while Abel brought several choice lambs from the best of his flock. The LORD accepted Abel and his offering, but he did not accept Cain and his offering. This made Cain very angry and dejected. “Why are you so angry?” the LORD asked him. “Why do you look so dejected? You will be accepted if you respond in the right way. But if you refuse to respond correctly, then watch out! Sin is waiting to attack and destroy you, and you must subdue it.” (Genesis 4:3-6)

Well..what’s a family holiday without a little bit of sibling rivalry? We could speculate all day about why God rejected Cain’s offering, but one thing is certain; this thing didn’t go down - in this way - because God hates peas! Cain was not rejected because “meat” is a better offering than “garden veggies”. There was definitely a heart issue with Cain that didn’t set well with the Lord. Abel gave his offering with a grateful heart.

Cain’s thanksgiving was like wax fruit in a bowl. It looked real on the outside, but in reality it was fake and useless. Abel on the other hand, remembered that every breath of air he breathed was a gift from God. As a response, he brought his best to the thanksgiving table.

This week we reflect on life and respond with being thankful. Let’s not forget that God cares very much about the heart behind our thankfulness, and He is not fooled when it is merely wax fruit in a bowl--set out to look pretty, but good for nothing. True and heartfelt thankfulness recognizes that every good thing in our life is directly from God's hand. It gives us hope and turns our eyes on Jesus.

What's So Bad About the Desert?

2010-09-28T16:36:00.025-05:00

Recently I took a 4-day trip to Nebraska with Chloe. The plan was to reconnect with my favorite teenagers, friends and mentors. While on the plane I took some time to reconnect with God too. I pulled out my Bible and said, "God, tell me something."

In 1 Kings 19, I read about a victorious man who had hit a wall, and was ready to give up. I've been there. There are moments in life and ministry, when I am discouraged and giving up seems like the easier way. Elijah had just defeated a slew of false prophets. He went home, and was getting ready to chill out on the couch with a Diet Mountain Dew over crushed ice. Just when he begins to revel in his victory, word is sent to him that Wicked Lady Jezebel is planning to kill him. (Who hasn't been kicked in the knees right after a great success?)

Fearing for his life, Elijah ran a day’s journey into the desert, sat down by a tree and said to God, “That’s it! I’ve had enough.”

Elijah was done. He prayed for death.

Exhaustion. Defeat. Fear. Simply ‘over it’. Have you ever felt like the combination of everything that’s going on in your life is just too much? I’m a wife, mother, daughter, friend, housekeeper, tutor, potty-trainer, volunteer, counselor...you get it. Sometimes it’s all just too overwhelming. I don’t even have a job outside of the home to add to that list, and there are days that I just feel TOTALLY incapable of doing it all. Maybe you identify with me, or maybe you have stress at work, issues with finances, questions about the future, conflict in relationships… realities of life. Possibly, just like a cherry on the sundae (but not as delicious), a crisis tops it all. Talk about a time to collapse.

That's what Elijah decided to do...collapse in the desert. Fast-forward a bit in his story and we read about Elijah's amazing (and literal) mountaintop experience with God. It’s totally awesome! The mountaintop is great. It feels good. But does that mean there is nothing to gain from being in the desert? Many times I’ve heard people say that they are “in a desert, a dry place, not hearing or feeling God”. They are just waiting for, and anticipating a mountaintop moment. Don't forget, God’s presence is in the desert too. It is possible that in a desert we can get strength for the journey back from collapse, strength for our trip to the top of the mountain.

Here are some tips from Elijah’s time spent in the desert:
Elijah prayed. Yes, he asked God to take his life…but it still counts! Elijah slept. Rest is important in order to maintain strength. Elijah was touched by an angel. God sent messengers to encourage and minister to Elijah. Recognize the messengers God is sending your way. Elijah ate, and then he ate again. Wow! I love to eat. The angel of the Lord provided a cake of bread and a jar of water. This angelic fare strengthened Elijah for his 40 day/40 night journey to the mountain.

So what did God say to me in that airplane, soaring over the clouds? In short...
1. I'm not the only person who has felt like giving up.
2. Time spent in a desert can be uncomfortable, but God is working there too.

The next time I feel like everything in life is stacked against me and I'm ready to collapse, I'm going to run a day's journey into the desert.

God Talks on Mondays

2010-07-19T11:17:00.040-05:00

Warning: First paragraph transparency level, 7

Last week stunk! Yesterday was Sunday, and I woke up feeling exhausted and annoyed from the drama of the previous week. I wasn't looking forward to gathering for worship at church. I just wanted to get it over with. (I'm human, acknowledge and move on.) The 'stinkiness' didn't end at church. Chris and I were both frustrated, resulting in a ruined lunch. Can I just say, "Aaagh!" I wanted to come home, and drown myself in some mind-numbing television. Chris wanted to watch Golf--so I guess we both won. Things are looking up! Honestly, by the end of lunch, we had said our apologies and we moved on from the frustration of the day. :)

Thankfully God speaks on Monday mornings too.

"Come to me all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30

What a lovey-dovey passage of scripture. It sounds so encouraging and "comfy". THEN...the going gets really tough. Things in life are pushed so far it is difficult to trust that walking with God will give us a life that is free and light. In the toughest of circumstances we are left with the question: "What in the world do you mean by easy? Because I'm with you God, and it doesn't seem true as far as my eyes can see!"

When we read God's word, we realize that there is no promise that following him was going to be an cushy life. In fact, if we do some 'not too in-depth' character studies, we soon realize that God is forever asking his followers to do hard (if not close to impossible) things.

Abraham, leave your home and family. I'll tell you where you're going later. Also, don't forget "sacrifice your son Isaac".

David, take three small rocks and kill the giant.

Esther, approach your husband the King without being summoned, even though the results often lead to death.

Hosea, marry that prostitute woman and redeem her with your love.

Jesus, give up your glory. Live among the wicked. Let yourself be tortured and killed.

God's ways seem anything but easy and light. We see over and over again that he asks his followers to live dangerous, risk-filled lives! Could it be that your job, your family, your crazy situation has been purposefully placed in your life for a reason...to grow you, or to reveal God's glory. So, how do we rest in him, through the risk and danger? Or, how do we trust him during the challenging circumstances that we face? How do we exchange our worry, weariness and burdens for Christ's peace, joy and rest?

The answer is simple. We need to stop picking up our old yoke. I wonder if sometimes we think Christ's easy yoke just feels too light and awkward. Our's is heavy and painful, but we've been trained so long under it, that it feels like a fit. So, we make the choice to carry our burdens around with us when Jesus offers a renewed life.

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me-watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly. Matthew 11:28-30, The Message

So, there ya go. That's what God said to me today. I'm with Him and my difficult, risky, sometimes impossible life is easy and light.

(Side note: I know there is a lot more theology behind the yoke and how it relates to the rabbi's, and their additional rules and regs for people to follow. But, that was not the topic of this blog. Rather, the practical aspect of the weary and burdened finding rest in Christ.)

2010-02-13T22:27:00.003-06:00

Today the little girl turned two. She did not like her birthday candle.

new shoes

2010-02-10T17:50:00.003-06:00

Bought a new pair of shoes today. Now I'm asking facebook to tell me if they're too much like granny shoes. I'm embarrassed.

Ducky

2010-02-05T21:36:00.003-06:00

When Chloe was a newborn, she wanted to be a thumb-sucker so bad. She would put her little hand to her mouth and suck until finally one day she found the thumb and in it went. I let her suck on her thumb long enough to take a picture. From that moment on, each time she went for her thumb at nap or bedtime, I removed her tiny finger and replaced it with a pacifier. My thoughts were..."I can take a pacifier away later, but I can never take away her thumb."

Tonight Chloe went night-night for the first time without her ducky. She is going to be two in just a week. I probably let her keep it as a comfort for longer than I should. But she had that sweet nickname for it, and just loved so much. When i would show it to her, she'd smile. When we'd talk about naptime she'd say, "blankie, ducky!" with such excitement.

Anyway, I feel like it's time to go...but it's kind of sad. So tonight I braced myself for the sadness, crying and screaming. I hid the duckies, and then got Chloe ready for bed. When she said "ducky" to me, I looked at her and said, "I don't know? I'm not sure where it is." (I guess that's pretty much a lie.) But she looked at me and said, "oh". So I laid her in her bed. I told her goodnight. I turned the light off, and walked out. I haven't heard a noise from her. Hmmm...I will miss the ducky. It's a tiny symbol my baby is growing up.

Monday Commentary- My Assignment

2010-01-11T09:46:00.008-06:00

Hmmm…didn’t I just wipe down that counter? Wait, don’t use that toilet, I just cleaned it! What? It’s mealtime AGAIN? Let’s just eat over this napkin…

In all honesty--there’s a part of my portfolio that I dislike. I mostly love what I do, but I am included in the 59% not actively engaged at work when it comes to the laundry. And I’m definitely a part of the additional 14% that is actively disengaging from their job when it comes to mopping the floors!

Yesterday was week 2 in our January Series My Life, My Mission. We focused on My Assignment. I'm an "at-home mom". You might have different job. Do you ever become dissatisfied? Maybe it’s mundane, or you’re frustrated with people. We learned yesterday that work is important to God. God worked. He created Adam and gave him work. Work is eternal. So even though we live for the dream of retirement in a warm place, by a beach, sipping an iced tea…it (work) will not be over.

So, how can I transform my perspective of work? The "easy" answer: stop viewing it as a curse, and start seeing it as an assignment. Sometimes I feel like my work has no value. No one notices that I picked up the house today, did some laundry, or organized a closet. Sometimes I feel like I’m not getting anywhere-just toiling. And I’m going to get to do it all again tomorrow! But a key statement from our talk yesterday was this,

“The value of your job isn’t the title or the assignment, but in whom you work for.”

That changes everything. “Whatever you do, do it whole heartedly as though you were working for your real master and not merely for humans.” -Col. 3:23

Now that I sense that the work that I do is a call from God, I gain new energy and purpose from the ONE who called me…and not from the job.

God, help me to embrace your calling and find joy in my assignment, as my life and my work is driven by a passion to honor you.

Got my skate on!

2010-01-09T22:40:00.002-06:00

Today I took Juliana and Ryan rollerskating with Joy, Gabe and Aiden. It was lots of fun. The kids had a super great time for our first experience.

Wish I had some pictures, but I locked my camera in the locker and didn't have more quarters to unlock it and then relock it. So silly. :)

Movies

2010-01-07T21:51:00.004-06:00

Watched 2 movies today:

500 Days of Summer with Chris before the kids came home from school. Loved it, then I thought I was going to hate it, but I ended up loving it. There is something about Zooey Deschanel that is kind of strange and yet she is such a cutie.

Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs...with the family, after dinner. Cute movie. We all loved it.

Fun day.

9 Blessings of 2009

2010-01-06T23:03:00.005-06:00

I'm a little behind in reviewing the year 2009. I'm a lot behind in reviewing the decade (maybe I'll do that next, or tomorrow.) So this isn't really a full review of the year, just a few of the blessings our family experienced in 2009.

9 blessings of 2009

1. We brought a wonderful season of ministry at New Life Assembly, in Kearney, NE to conclusion in February. We were so blessed by our friends' words of love and encouragement to us and our children.

2. God gave our family safe travels to Arizona.

3. Wonderfully smooth transition for our children into their new schools.

4. God provided a beautiful home in a nice neighborhood, and gave us a wonderful Christian family with kids to play with...right across the street.

4. We found a great interim church for our kids to plug into on Wednesday nights. So thankful they are able to learn about Jesus with lots of other kids!

5. We've seen many new faces at Copper Mountain, including several young families.

6. I was able to take a trip to Rapid City with Chloe, to visit my mom, sister and brother.

7. I have been able to develop some meaningful relationships with women/moms my age.

8. I have been able to volunteer in Ryan's kindergarten class, I enjoy spending time with him in that setting.

9. We enjoyed a wonderful holiday season--especially watching Juliana and Ryan sing in their little programs at church.

If there's a hole, you might as well fill it.

2010-01-06T22:50:00.003-06:00

Today in the car Chloe suddenly became very irritable, started crying and grabbed at her face/nose. This behavior was SO unlike her we immediately decided to just drive to the ER. I was certain she had put something in her nose.

The ER wait was short and uneventful. Finally they called her name. Chris took her in while I watched the big kids in the lobby. A few minutes later Chris texted me that the item which was lodged way high up in the nose was a Jolly Rancher wrapper.

Silly girl.

Must be a boy thing?

2010-01-02T22:54:00.004-06:00

Last night we slept and Auntie Ann's and Uncle Tim's in Phoenix. We were there visiting for New Year...and celebrating Puccini Christmas.

So this morning I walked up to the loft where the kids were camped out. I was sitting with Ryan on the couch as he was still snuggled under the blankets and his head was on my lap. I was rubbing his face and said to him, "I love you Ryan."

Then, he sat up straight on the couch, looked at me, and punched me right in the nose.

I'm still confused about it.

Must be a boy thing.

Kisses

2009-12-02T22:28:00.004-06:00

Trying to catch a pic of Chloe and Ryan giving kisses night-night.
But it kinda looks like Ryan forgot he is kissing his baby sister.

Monday Commentary

2009-11-30T08:37:00.009-06:00

WoNderFuL CouNseLor

Yesterday at Copper Mountain we began a new series, "He Will Be Called" which will take us through Christmas.

My husband's message is always so useful for our everyday lives. Yesterday's focus, Jesus was born, and He would be called "Wonderful Counselor". The indescribable-too wonderful for words kind of wonderful!

Chris mentioned a verse from the Bible that tells us how Jesus came NOT for the healthy, but for the sick. We are all sick with something...maybe pride, materialism, depression, lonliness, anger, addictions, mean in spirit. The Wonderful Counselor came for the sicknesses that are found in me: lack of patience, stubborness, oh the list goes on.

Each point challenged me:

First, be honest with the counselor. Why? Because Jesus doesn't know that I'm sick? No way! He knows me inside and out, I get to cast my cares on Him.

Second, listen to His voice. How much do we enjoy in our everyday life when a friend asks us for advice, and even as we are giving it we realize they've already tuned it out. It probably wasn't what they wanted to hear. Or as parents, we try to teach our children. We try to guide them in the right ways to behave...and then they chose their own way. I have to guard myself from doing that with Jesus. Advice doesn't help at all if the hearer doesn't listen. I must train my ear to know, and listen to, the voice of the Wonderful Counselor.

Third, DO what the counselor tells me to do. OUCH! Sometimes I don't want to. Sometimes following advice is painful. Sometimes it means I have to make some changes in me.

To me, the beauty of this message was not that we have to become perfect and eliminate everything that's "wrong" with us. It is that we HAVE a Wonderful Counselor who can help us with our sickness. Jesus, that tiny babe in the manger of the nativity set I just placed in my living room...(well not the little ceramic guy...but the REAL guy)...is my WONDERFUL COUNSELOR.

Blog Give Away: Custom T-shirts and Onesies

2009-11-29T16:21:00.003-06:00

Check out this blog giveaway at the following link:

http://hereiswhatido.blogspot.com/2009/11/giveaway.html

Submit a comment on the blog for a chance to win!

Thankfulness

2009-11-26T22:37:00.003-06:00

5 things I'm thankful for: (These are obvious.)

1. Jesus- What a God! He loves me, he loves me, he loves me.

2. Chris- He tolerates me. He takes me out for lunch. :)

3. Juliana- My talking partner...she pretty much always has something to tell me.

4. Ryan- My Sonshine. I love that skinny boy.

5. Chloe- Such an angel. So sweet, kind, funny, easy-going...such a fun kiddo to haul around with me where-ever I go

Monday Commentary- Mirror, Mirror

2009-11-19T23:51:00.006-06:00

Nuggets from Sunday's talk at CM, and my application. This was written on monday, but hey...it's been a hectic week.

I am, in random order, a:

daughter.sister.wife.teacher.mother.friend.leader

………IDENTITY
Who am I? How do I comprehend my distinctiveness when I’m labeled so many different ways? I was given a name at birth that will be different than the name on my grave marker. So, how do I live my life without experiencing a case of mistaken identity?

I strip away the overlay of my roles. I fold back the coverings that are projections others have placed on me. I peel ALL OF IT to find the core of who I really am. I remove the film from the mirror, so I am able to recognize the reflection. After disposing of all the external layers, I am able to see that my true identity depends upon my closest relationship.

Sovereign God put His gifts in me for his purposes. I am here to serve his will. In the words of Paul, “I am a servant of Christ Jesus”.

Galatians 5:13 says, “You have been called to live in freedom … But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature [self-centeredness]. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love.”

The moment I surrendered my life to Christ, I took on a new identity. I became a new creation. It is impossible for me to be a Christ Follower and also extract being his servant.

“God, may I accept that I am not my own. Help me to not selfishly satisfy my own desires. May be identified as a servant of Christ, let my life bring glory to you alone.”

Win Paper and Pebbles Inc.!

2009-06-05T23:27:00.004-05:00

Check out this blog for a chance to win some really cute paper for the lil'miss and lil' buddy in your life! Read the blog, comment on it, and you will be entered to win! How awesome is that?

for boys: http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=186666105429&h=dEKx0&u=D4lyi&ref=nf

for girls: http://pebblesinc.blogspot.com/2009/05/lil-miss-sneak-peek.html

Monday Commentary

2009-06-01T16:42:00.006-05:00

Well, today is Monday, so I guess it's time for the commentary. But, I can't really give one because I was not in the service yesterday. If you'd like to read about it, head on over to Chris's blog http://www.propempo.blogspot.com/. I was filling in for the preschool teachers because they both were needing to be absent yesterday. So I had the 3 year olds through kindergarten age. I was covering Ryan's class. Of course since his mom was the teacher he didn't think he needed to sit down when I said, and he was pretty upset when I called on the little girl to answer first instead of him. Sheesh. He doesn't reason well, I can't wait until he's a little better at it.

Anyway, the lesson was about Pentecost. So we sang a few songs and I read to them from the Jesus Storybook Bible (the events in the upper-room), and then we started our crafts which were windsocks with red streamers for the tail. When we look at our windsock blowing in the wind, we can be reminded of how God breathed life on His church. The Holy Spirit came, and it sounded like a strong, mighty wind. Tongues of fire appeared on their head (which kind of resembled the red streamers), and they spoke in languages that were not their own.

I was pretty wiped by the end of service. I think I have strep throat. Probably shouldn't have been around the kids, but I guess that's just how it goes sometimes. There wasn't really anyone to be the sub for the sub.

Stay tuned for another blog today (possibly). I was wanting some potato soup...something soft and easy on my throat. I found a really yummy recipe. I will try and post it later.

Things That Are Little Can Actually Be BIG

2009-05-19T17:39:00.004-05:00

Today Juliana's class put on a little performance for parents. It was nice...they sang a couple songs, did a little play, gave parents some gifts.

Tracking back a little bit, when I got to the school I was amazed because there was NO parking. Every space was full and cars were lining the streets and I figured something else had to be going on. Turned out it was 5th grade graduation and picnic. Ugh, I didn't want to get to her room late. I was going to have to park down the block and hike to the office to sign in and then get to her room before this thing started. Chris got there right after me and actually got a closer parking space...grrr. We walked in together and as we got to her hall, her class was standing in line outside the room. I think I heard a classmate tell her that her mom and dad were there...and I'm pretty sure I saw a sigh of relief on her face when she saw us for herself. Oh...the stress of wondering where mom and dad are as the performance is getting ready to begin...it can just be too much for a child.

Today was early out at school, so the children had the option of leaving with their parents. Juliana said she signed up for lunch and was going to stay, but then changed her mind. So we all went to Burger King (minus Ryan--which Juliana thought was kind of special). After BK I took the girls to target. I bought Juliana a pen that writes, stamps and blows bubbles and a Camp Rock notepad. We picked out insect capsules for Ryan. As we were riding to pick up Ryan, Juliana wrote in her notepad, "Dear Diary, Today was a great day with mom!" Such little things that made a special day for a little girl...it's like it erases all the tough days.

By the end of this week both kids will be home for summer break. Hopefully the balance of our summer will tip the scale toward more special days.

2009-05-17T21:22:00.002-05:00

Today after church we went to the home of a couple in our church. Oh my...the nicest house I've ever been in. I can't even believe I went there with my children. As we were let past the entry to the gated community, I looked around and the "threats" to my children were heaped on even more than normal: do not run in the house, do not yell, do not jump on the furniture, do not sit on the furniture with your knees, eat whatever they serve us, do not belch, do not fight with each other, do not touch each other, don't say you don't like something, smile, be polite, say "thank you". Sheesh. Honestly, it was REALLY pleasant...the kids behavior was great and little correction was required. The added bonus was there was a lovely pool surrounded by the most beautiful desert I've seen in arizona yet (and just so you know I think the mountain in my backyard is pretty nice). I realize the pool helped. If we would have had to sit and "visit" in the home for that length of time, the kids would have been bored sooner, but we all swam and Chloe floated in her baby tube. Fun, fun...good food too.

I'm Losin' It

2009-05-13T13:12:00.005-05:00

The other day I decided to start the Weight Watchers diet (at home). I've done it twice before, never enrolling in a program...I just used info I received online and from relatives who were part of the program and attending meetings. Anyway, both times before it was successful for the purposes I needed it...to drop 10 pounds quick.

Anyway, I still haven't lost all my weight from being preggers with Chloe. I was down to only needing to lose about 6 pounds, but then I had my muscle injuries last May which depleted my ability to work out for a while. After moving to Arizona, I've been enjoying all the lovely restaurants around and not paying attention! SO...here's my deal. My "realistic" goal is to lose 14 pounds. My dream goal is to lose 24 pounds. I'll let you know when I get there.

Now I'm going to go eat lunch at Paradise Bakery! And I'm going to watch my points! I'm sad I won't eat the cookie, because it is 7 points. :) I will give it to Chloe.

Monday’s Commentary: How are you shaping?

2009-05-11T18:41:00.002-05:00

If you are a woman, quite possibly you have looked into the mirror and thought, “I think I’m turning into my mother”. Or, maybe you’ve heard yourself say something to your children and thought, “That sounded just like my mother!” The truth is, we all pick up traits from our mothers and fathers that we carry with us into our own adulthood.

Yesterday was Mother’s Day, and Chris’s message focused on the mother’s very critical and important job, to shape the heart of a child. I don’t even think our qualifications for such a task were checked before we were given this portfolio!

The point that stood out to me was, “A child becomes a mirror of your spiritual heart.” Yikes. How am I doing when it comes to shaping the hearts of the three children God entrusted to me? Am I passing on a desire to pursue Jesus? Do I show them how to search out God to find His plan for their life, or do I display an independent nature that says I will do what interests me? Am I modeling how to be generous with money, time and gifts?

Whether I like it or not, I will reproduce myself in my children…the good, the bad and the ugly. And sometimes the ugly is really ugly. Your children (and mine) are smart. They know what you are passionate about. They know how much you care about your looks, your possessions, and your status. They know if you love your hobbies and entertainment. They know if you are passionate about knowing Jesus and making him known.

If you are not a mother, you are not off the hook! Actually, if we are Christ-followers, we are commanded to also be disciple-makers. If you are discipling someone, you are a spiritual parent to them.

So, what will it look like when your finished shaping?

Monday Commentary: You Wanna Know a Secret?

2009-05-04T13:03:00.010-05:00

I'm not sure about you, but I love secrets. (I don't like it when people are keeping secrets from me)...but if I can be in on one, oh yeah, that's the stuff. I think as a child it was fun when a friend would tell me a secret and then I'd tell everyone about it...just so that THEY would know that I knew. However, after that it wasn't a secret anymore, and of course the major byproduct was the loss of trust from a friend. Now that I am an adult, I understand and value trust better. When someone shares something personal with me, as a "secret", I see it more as a gift and honor that they trusted me enough with something so valuable.

After marrying Chris, we became each other's "secret keepers". It's nice to share a secret between just us. I think three favorite secrets that we have shared together were each time I was pregnant with one of our children. We loved to keep the secret between us for as long as possible. It was always fun to know that we were the only ones who "knew". There is something special about having a person you are close to and can confide in.

Yesterday in our new series, Where the Water is Deep, I learned that God has secrets too...but not the kind of secret that he wants to keep from me. God wants me to be "in" on his secrets. (Yay!) As we become dissatisfied with just getting our toes wet, and we jump into the deep water with God, it is there he shares his secrets. In Psalm 25:14 it says, "The secret of the Lord is for those who fear him, and He will make them know His covenant." The Message Bible says it this way, "God-friendship is for God-worshipers; they are the ones He confides in."

I would never expect a stranger or mere acquaintance to share their inmost secrets with me. (Unless they were lying on a couch and paying me an hourly fee.) Secrets are between close friends, and I see now that if I want God to whisper his secrets in my ear, then I must have friendship with Him. I hope you want to be his friend too...He has lots to talk to you about.

Puke and Snakes

2009-05-03T22:55:00.005-05:00

As I parked the car in the lot at church this morning, the girl in the back seat (my daughter's friend, Anna) said, "I'm nauseous. I think I'm going to throw up". So I replied, "Well, get out of my car!" So she did, she tried to feel better, but I think she just didn't want me to take her home. 8 minutes later she was puking on the patio of the church! So we found a pail and off I went to take her home!

We saw a snake today. The boys in the "hood" came running down the cul-de-sac announcing the snake. It wasn't a rattler...so we just let it go. Don't know what it was, it just looked like a normal snake.

Carnival and Jokes

2009-05-02T23:18:00.003-05:00

Last night our family enjoyed a great time together at Juliana's school Carnival. This event was HUGE. Rock climbing wall, 10+ inflatables, and lots of games that our kids really didn't play. They were too interested in the inflatables.

There was easily 1500 people who attended this event. 1 child wore a face mask...due to the Swine Flu scare I'm presuming.

Our kids have picked up on a new joke that they enjoy telling me everyday.

Juliana: What is your name?
Me: Mommy
Juliana: What color is the sky
Me: Blue
Juliana: What is the opposite of down?
Me: Up
Juliana: Mommy Blew Up! (hahahaha...lots of laughter)

Next:
Ryan: What is your name?
Me: Mommy
Ryan: What's this (pointing to nose)
Me: Nose
Ryan: What's in my hand (holds together empty hands)
Me: Nothing
Ryan: Mommy knows nothing! (hahaha...more laughter!)

Revival of Rainbow Fish...

2008-10-13T14:45:00.006-05:00

Guess what? It turned up! That's right everybody, Rainbow Fish has been found.

Its finding is a bit of a mystery in and of itself. I sent Ryan downstairs to get his clothes for school, and as he was changing in the middle of the living room floor he said, "Look Mom, Here's Rainbow Fish...now we can go back to the library." I said, "WOW! You found it! Where was it?" He said, "Right here on the living room floor" (Now trust me...my house gets cluttered for sure, but I know that movie hasn't been on the living room floor for 53 days!) But Ryan insisted he did not bring it up from downstairs (even though I think he did).

I would like to know where it's been hiding all this time, but I guess that really doesn't matter. It is found, I don't have to pay for it, and that is what matters.

Thanks Target Clearance

2008-10-03T11:23:00.010-05:00

Target had their bike helmets clearanced this week...and water bottles! Yay!

Chris cleaned the garage one day, and in the process put the bike helmets in a safe place. So safe we don't know where they are, and for the last few weeks Juliana and Ryan's heads have not been safe because they've been riding without their helmets. So I got Ryan an awesome police officer helmet, and Juliana a lovely green with flowers helmet. $3 each. She is less than thrilled, as she has been enjoying the freedom of the wind through her hair as she rides. But Ryan loves his new helmet...so now they have 2 helmets each (when we find the old ones).

We also needed a new water bottle for Juliana because in her words, "Jordan saw some of the middle schoolers bury my school water bottle at the park after I forgot it there one day." Hmmm...the kids spent some time digging over there to find it, but after finding a family of worms, and fingernails so dirty I'm not sure I'll get them clean, they only found the lid. So water bottles were also on clearance. Ryan broke his lid after an hour, but I'm holding it together with a rubber band and it is working well. Boys are so rough.

Throwing in a picture of Chloe's first time swinging at the park. She is growing and learning fast. The other day she started clapping a little bit. I also included a couple of her smiling big! Ignore the juice on her shirt...she's adorable.

Lucky Number Seven

2008-09-30T17:38:00.011-05:00

On September 27th, Juliana turned seven. Yeah! She has been excited for her birthday for a very long time. She had big plans in mind. This year she wanted to invite all of the girls in her class, AND her friends from church to the house for a party. AND she wanted all of them to make a "neat" craft. She got this bright idea while attending a birthday party last winter for her friend Abby. Abby's mom helped the girls make jean pocket purses that were totally cool and chic! So, this was very much what Juliana wanted to do, and she wanted Abby's mom to come and teach the craft. Thank you for your vote of confidence Juliana!

Well, this year I had decided against a big "friend" party...I just started thinking that we don't need to do one for every birthday. However, like every mom, I wanted my girl's birthday to be special.

Juliana had been talking for several months about wanting to go to the Build-a-Bear Workshop. So, we planned a special day to Omaha for her to stay in a hotel, swim and go to Build-a-Bear. What fun!

Juliana has, for some reason, always loved leopards. That is why it is no surprise really, when faced with a choice of which animal to pick...she chose the wildlife leopard. She named her Spotty.

Ryan got to participate in the fabulous building of bears too...he did not chose a bear either. His selection was the most adorable turtle that came with a backpack shell...loved it. Ryan loves green, so this selection is also not a surprise. He named his turtle Roman.

Lost and Found and Lost again...

2008-08-22T23:26:00.006-05:00

Does anyone remember losing something as a child or teenager and just being so frustrated that you couldn't find it? If your house was/is anything like mine, then usually it was "Mom's Fault" that the precious belonging was missing! Now I am the Mom! Aaggh!

Every week we check out videos from the library for the kids. Last week when we went to return them, I was short one video- Rainbow Fish. Oops. I knew it was somewhere in the house, I was pretty sure downstairs. I just asked if we could check it out one more week so that we wouldn't be fined. "No Problem, Ma'am." So we went home, and along with our newly checked out DVD's, we were able to enjoy Rainbow Fish for one more week. Today I go to the library to return the DVD's and I'm short one. Yep, you guessed it, Rainbow Fish. Oh, but I can't check it out again...I've already renewed it once. So I am going to be fined 15 cents every day until I find and return it. Okay, I realize that 15 cents is not much when you are thinking of being overdue 1 or 2 days, even a week. But the problem is at this moment Rainbow Fish is "unfindable". I know that's not a word...I just mean, I CAN'T FIND IT! I've looked in all of the normal, expected places and it's not in any of them. Which is really a problem, because if it's not in a reasonable place then that means Ryan carried it around with him and left it somewhere strange. Or it means I picked it up and set it somewhere in haste and cannot recall, at all, where it is!

I hate moments like this, when I can't find something I'm looking for. Seriously, I think it warps my brain a little. I don't want to own Rainbow Fish.

I've bribed the children...$1 to spend at the dollar spot at Target to the child who finds the movie. What do I get if I find it : peace of mind, I guess. Mom if your reading this...have you seen Rainbow Fish?

What I'm thinking...

2008-08-21T00:04:00.004-05:00

I have recipes to type.
I spend too much time on Facebook.
Tonight I got to talk to some adults, WOW!
I will be tired when I have to get Juliana ready for school in the morning.
Tomorrow I'll get more accomplished. I promise.
Tomorrow is lunchrun...I wonder where the teenagers will want to go.
I love my family.
Chloe could not be a better baby.

Let's get caught up!

2008-08-19T22:33:00.004-05:00

Summer is over...

I have been looking forward to the end of summer since before it began. Don't get me wrong, I love my children, and I love spending time with them, but I really love education. And I really love my children being educated 5 days a week in a classroom setting.

Last thursday Juliana went back to school. She started second grade and is SO excited to have Ms. Olson, a brand new teacher, to spend this year with. Yesterday we met Ryan's preschool teacher. He will start on August 27th and he is very excited!

I realize that it has been quite a while since my last posting. So here is the summer run down of our summer events...

*In May, the last day of school, I was admitted to the hospital with Rhabdomyolosis. The very short version of the story is that I severely damaged the muscles in my legs during a group cyling class. I don't recommend getting Rhabdomyolosis as it is VERY PAINFUL and I thought I was dying. So I was in the hospital for 4 days and was catered to...given all of my meals in bed and basically left alone to heal...it was wonderful and peaceful, despite the pain.

*In June, the family packed up and went to summer camps in Lexington, fun times. After camps, Chris had some time off and instead of taking a trip out of town we stayed home and did some things at the house like painting and "what-not" as he would say.

*July flew by. My brother, his wife and my niece came to visit, followed by Chris's brother and family. The rest of the month was mainly consumed with random youth events.

*August 1st, Chris flew to NYC for a missions trip. My mom came to visit, yeah. We ate out every day and I haven't been on the scale to see the damage. I have taken time off from the YMCA while I was healing, but planned to go back to working out when the kids started school, and for some reason the Y is closed all week...just my luck. I am forced to just not excersize for 1 more week...(I guess I could walk outside).

Juliana is lovely, wonderful and smart.
Ryan is an adorable, hilarious monkey.
Chloe is sweet, precious, an angel baby...and growing too fast!

Wish me luck, I'm going to try and do better!

Parts

2008-04-11T12:30:00.004-05:00

These photos are a little dated now that Chloe is almost 2 months old. But they are just too precious to not share them. I desired to create a scrapbook page that would capture Chloe's tiny parts.

For All to See and Random Updates

2008-04-10T10:40:00.005-05:00

I decided to develop a blog that can be viewed by anyone. We have myspace and facebook accounts, but my friends and family that were not members were unable to view pictures, etc. So I'm starting this one with the intent to solve that issue. Let's see if it works!

Chris has been attending the Willow Creek conference in Chicago this week. So, this temporarily single mom has been managing to survive on her own. Ryan was massively ill Tuesday with the flu. An experience we shared in the bathroom was the lowest point of the week so far. Unfortunately we had to cancel a Burger King night with our neighbor friends because of it.

Today it's raining outside. The birds are still busy playing pick up sticks in the field-turned-lake across the street. No outside recess for the kids today. I'm sure Juliana will come home with some energy she needs to release. We will have swimming lessons tonight at the Y. Chloe slept until 6 this morning!